Just call me Daddy

I've wanted to be a father for quite some time. I've said I would like to have 10 kids.

After my first child was aborted I fell into a pit of despair, wondering why I wasn't deemed good enough...why wasn't my seed good enough? I couldn't understand how its mother could just kill it with no remorse for its life or mine.

When my son Daenarick was born, I had no knowledge of him even existing. I was robbed of experiencing his development and growth. I didn't have the chance to feel his mother's stomach or to feel his little kicks. I missed out on the morning sickness and everything...seeing his little body in her womb on the ultrasounds...just being there for them in general.

That's why I was so hurt when his mother finally decided to tell me about him fifteen years later. I missed out on his entire life up until that point. Finding my sun brought me so much joy; this man was headed to a bad end. Being Daenarick's dad has changed my life for the best, not better. I work hard to provide him with the best life I can give him. He deserves it all. He is a wonderful, beautiful soul and I couldn't ask for a better kid.

Although blessed to have such a wonderful sun, I've still had a flame burning inside of me that's wanted another child...a little daughter perhaps. I dreamt of this for a while now. After a failed attempt with my wife I just began to give up. She had her three babies already, and I felt bad for the amount of pressure I once put on her to have my baby. I guess it just wasn't the right time for us. After we parted ways, I thought the dream would die along with the great love affair we had. I began to open myself to finding that special someone to build a family with.

Well, Lady Fate has changed all of that. I am proud and happy to say that I did indeed get my wife pregnant, during our last go-round together. If only I'd known; I never would have given up on our love. I never would have packed me and my sun up and left the home I had built for us. You have to understand, even tho I'd finally made her mine I still felt like she was going to leave me and choose him, plus my conscience was nagging me, telling me to do the right thing and bow out gracefully. Had I known we'd made a baby together...that she was pregnant at that point, I never would have left. I would have pulled her to me and kiss her and tell her to send him to shit, that Daddy was home...that I, her man, was home and her husband had to go...

But I didn't know. I was only thinking of what I thought would be best for them, so removing myself from their lives seemed the only way to go. I feel bad knowing that I abandoned the woman I loved and left her pregnant, but I guess there was method in my madness after all. I didn't leave her empty handed; I provided her and her family a home and a bank account. I guess the Goddess was whispering in my ear what to do. I left her everything for a reason. Now our child shall grow up in that house, the house that was to be our home.

But the blessings didn't stop there. Lady Fate has been very busy working for me, and I've also been very busy with my new production line😏 Recently, I've been seeing a young lady whom I thought could take my wife's place. I hate to say it like that but I have to be honest here. My new girl is so much more than a replacement; she got a firsthand view of the depth of my love for Semaj and the hurt I was going thru and she still wants to be here with me. She looked to ease my pain and maybe I could ease some of hers. Taz had suffered a miscarriage before from an earlier toxic relationship and told me how she dreamt of her baby still. It broke my heart bcuz I felt that. I've been there, not able to let go of a lost child. We figured we'd just let Nature take its course for us, bcuz honestly I jump...dive...head first into relationships and always seem to fuck things up. I wanted a relationship that could work for the both of us. We obviously enjoyed each other's time bcuz I am proud to say that she is pregnant for me as well.

I have never felt more pleased with myself before. I have my wonderful young lord here with me, plus I have these two little blessings on their way into this world. I feel a change unlike no other in me. I can't explain but I just feel like a new man. Like I have purpose. I just feel so differently. I smile a hell of a lot more. My sex drive is thru the roof and that's finally a good thing bcuz I can't wait to enjoy pregnancy sex😁 I feel sexier somehow, like I'm carrying around this sexy secret or something. I'm happy damn it.

With all this happiness I'm feeling, there is also the bittersweet. It seems callous of me to be so happy when I've hurt others so. If only I could have given what was so beautifully wanted...believe I would have💯

I know having two women pregnant for me at the same time will be a challenge but their comfort is the only thing of importance right now. I know I must be there equally for each woman, and honestly your boy is up for the task😊.

I always had this saying: "Don't call me Daddy unless u wanna make me one." Well, I gues Lady Fate wanted to make me one, and I couldn't feel more blessed💯 I thank her and both of the mothers for blessing me with these gifts.

Peace and Love to all.